Nothing Even Matters
by leeann-schmidt
Summary: Kendall returns after leaving LeeAnn saying that he still loves her. She thinks life will go back to the way it was before he became famous. Can she she handle it with girls all over Kendall, or will she give up?
1. Chapter 1: Big Time Loss

"But, Kendall, I love you," I said quietly. Tears were falling from my eyes.

"I know you do," Kendall said, "but I just don't feel the same way anymore."

"That's a lie," I said. "I can see it in your eyes." I could tell he was fighting tears. "You still love me."

He put his hand on my shoulder. "I'm sorry, LeeAnn."

Kendall's hand fell off my shoulder. He looked into my eyes one last time and walked away. The rain started falling and everyone left the park. I was alone.

I found a dry spot under the slide and sat down. I was crying harder than I ever have before.

Kendall has been my best friend for 11 years. We've been dating for a year. His band was becoming more popular. I supported him through everything. And he left me. He left me alone in the park.

_**-*Kendall's P.O.V*-**_

"Dude, why'd you lie to her?" James asked. "You love her."

"I don't want her to have to deal with everything we are gonna have to," I said wiping tears from my eyes.

"She loves you," Logan said. "She'd deal with it."

"But I don't want to put her through that. It's a pain in the ass."

"Kendall, you need to get her back," he said. "She's been in love with you for a while. This is probably tearing her apart."

"You're not helping me, man!" I said loudly.

"Sorry, bro, but it's the truth."

I sighed. The bus started moving. "It's too late now."

"Kendall," James said, "I-"

"Forget it," I said interrupting him. "I'm going to my room." I walked to the back of the tour bus and laid on my bed. The tears were falling harder and faster than before. I can't believe I left her.

"I'm so stupid," I whispered.

I could hear Logan and James talking through the door.

"Should we go talk to him?" James asked.

"I think we should leave him alone," Logan said. "He's really upset."

I put my pillow over my head and tried to go to sleep.

_**-*LeeAnn's P.O.V*-**_

_"LeeAnn, I love you," Kendall said. He kissed me._

_"I love you, too," I said, breathless. "I have for three years."_

_"Really?" he asked smiling. "I should've done this earlier." We laughed. "Be my girlfriend?"_

_"Of course," I said smiling._

_Suddenly, everything changed. The sunny day changed to a violent storm. I was at the park. Kendall looked different. He was taller and his hair was longer._

_"I don't love you anymore," he said. He started to walk away._

_"Kendall, wait!" I said running after him. "Don't go!"_

_He ignored me and kept walking. Then he vanished._

_"Kendall!" I screamed. My face was soaked with tears and my body was soaked with rain. "Kendall!" I screamed again. I collapsed to the ground._

My alarm went off and I jumped up. I was crying.

When I got up and looked in the mirror, I cringed. My hair was tangled. My eyes were puffy and red. My lip was swollen from falling on my walk home last night.

I wasn't looking forward to school. Kendall graduated 3 weeks ago. It was the last week of my freshman year.

I looked at the clock and groaned. The bus would be here in ten minutes. I was used to Kendall taking me. I quickly brushed my teeth and put my hair in a bun. I found sweats and a hoodie and put them on.

I ran outside just in time for the bus to pull up. I got on the bus and found my friend Jessica.

"Whoa, you're riding the bus?" Jessica asked. "Why isn't Kendall taking you?" I bit my lips and tears came to my eyes. She noticed. "LeeAnn, what's wrong?"

"Kendall left me," I whispered. "He left me in the park last night. He's gone."

"What?" she said. "He just left you? Did he say why?"

"He said he didn't love me anymore," I said. My voice was still soft. "He told me and then he left me alone."

"After all the support you've given him and his band," she said. "What a bitch."

"He's not a bitch," I said defensively. "He's just being a jerk right now."

_**-*Kendall's P.O.V*-**_

When I woke up, the sun was shining through the window. I walked to the kitchen area of the bus. We were still moving.

"Hey, man," Logan said. "Feeling any better?"

"Not really," I said shrugging. "I still feel like shit."

"Well you slept for like 18 hours," Carlos said.

I shrugged again. I looked in the fridge and couldn't find anything. I started back to my bed.

"Are you not gonna eat?" Logan asked.

I shook my head. "I don't feel like eating."

"Bro, you have to eat," James said with a mouth full of cereal. He swallowed. "And you can't go back to sleep. We'll be in L.A. in about 5 hours. You have to be awake."

"I don't want to be in L.A.," I said sitting down. "I want to back in Texas."

"Kendall, we've got to get your mind off last night," Logan said. "You can't keep thinking of her."

"But you didn't see her face when I left her," I whispered. "She was so upset." I started crying again.

"Hey," Carlos said sitting beside me, "we can help you get through this. You just have to let us."

"He's right," Logan said. "And the first way to get over her is to delete her. Completely."

"Delete her?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said grabbing the laptop," delete her from your phone, Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, stuff like that."

"But I don't want to."

"You need to," James said. "You need to forget about her."

"You'll have to do anything that you have to till you forget about her," Carlos said.

"I can't forget about her."

_**-*LeeAnn's P.O.V*-**_

"It's summer!" Jessica exclaimed as she got on the bus that Thursday afternoon. "I'm so excited!"

"I'd rather have school," I said. She looked at me like I was crazy. "With all the craziness and stress from finals, I haven't been thinking about him a lot. Now with no school, I'll be thinking about him a lot." She took my phone. "What are you doing?"

"There," she said giving me my phone back. "I deleted Kendall's number. It's the first step."

"Why would you do that?" I said. "He just got a new number. I haven't memorized it yet!"

"Exactly," she said. "Now you can forget about him and have an awesome summer! But you have to delete him from everything else, too, in order to forget about him."

"But I don't want to forget about him," I said.

"You need to."

"I can't forget about him."

_**Note from the author!**_

_**I know it's not the best, but oh well. I'm having fun writing this story and my friends love it. I've got quite a bit of it written already. So, if I can just get some readers... I'll be updating a lot And I know it's kind of short… But this is how all the chapters are. They're 3 pages front and back, 6 pages total, in my journal and I thought they were gonna be longer. But this is just how it is. Hope you enjoy!**_

_**-XOXO LeeAnn**_


	2. Chapter 2: Big Time Birthday Party

_***One Year Later***_

"What are you doing for your sweet 16?" Jessica asked.

"My mom said I could have a party, but I don't know if I'm going to," I said shrugging.

"What?" She exclaimed. "You have to! I'll help you plan it!"

"Well, I guess," I said, "but I don't want a lot of people here. 15 or 20 tops."

"I'll go start planning!" she said walking to the door. "I'll call you later!"

_***Kendall's P.O.V***_

"It's good to be home again," I said to my brother, Kevin. He was reading a letter.

"Mhmm," he said, not really paying attention. He put the letter on the table and walked away. I grabbed it and read it.

"_Kevin Schmidt,  
>You are invited to LeeAnn Gunter's Sweet Sixteen birthday party!<br>Where: Her house  
>When: June 26, 7:00 P.M.<br>We hope to see you there!  
>Love, Jessica."<em>

I thought about it. Her birthday is tomorrow. Sweet 16.

Kevin walked back in. He saw the letter in my hand and gave me a sympathetic smile.

"Are you going?" I asked.

"I was thinking about it," Kevin said, "but I wasn't sure."

"You should go," I said with a fake smile. "She'll enjoy seeing you.

"You sure you're OK with it?" he asked.

I cleared my throat. "Yeah," I said unconvincingly. "I'll be fine. We broke up a year ago."

"Kendall, you don't have to pretend to be over her," he said softly. "I know you're not."

"But I'm trying."

_***LeeAnn's P.O.V***_

When I opened the door, I was shocked. "Kevin?" I glanced behind him at the road. Kendall's car. He was driving.

"Happy birthday, LeeAnn!" Kevin said hugging me. Kendall drove away.

"Kevin!"I said smiling. "What are you doing here? I thought you were on tour with-"I stopped and bit my lip.

"Jessica invited me," he said smiling sympathetically, "and we got back earlier this week."

I looked at him. He looked so much like Kendall that it hurt.

"I'm so glad you came," I said.

"Why wouldn't I?" he asked.

"LeeAnn!" Jessica yelled from the living room. "Time to open presents!"

I grabbed Kevin's hand and dragged him with me.

_***Kendall's P.O.V***_

"Why can't Kenneth go get him?" I asked my mom.

"Because I told you to and Kenneth is not home," she said sternly. "He needs to get home. Now go."

"But mom-"

"Now."

I groaned and walked out the door.

_***LeeAnn's P.O.V***_

"Jess, can you get that?" I asked when the door bell rang. "I need to put this plate in the sink to soak. It's covered in dry cheese dip."

"Sure," she said. She opened the door.

"I'm here to get Kevin."

I dropped the plate and it shattered. The door opened wider. Kendall was staring at me and I stared back.

"Well this is awkward," Jessica whispered.

"I'll go get Kevin," I said softly as I ran to the kitchen.

"What was that crash?" Kevin asked.

"I dropped a plate," I said.

"Why?"

"Ke-" I took a deep breath. It was shaky. "He's here to get you."

"Oh, I see."

We walked back to the living room. Kendall was still standing at the door awkwardly.

"I'll see you later," Kevin said hugging me.

"Bye," I said quietly.

Kendall gave me a small smile and I returned it with a small wave. I shut the door. I could hear them arguing.

"I'm gonna head home," Jessica said walking out the back door. I didn't reply. I had my ear against the front door.

"Why does it bother you?" Kevin asked.

"Because I'm still in love with her and you know that!" Kendall yelled.

I stepped backwards, my mind racing. I ran upstairs to my bed crying. My mom came into my room and I pretended to be asleep.

"You're not fooling me," she said. "I know you're awake. I heard you crying. Now what's wrong?"

I sat up and wiped my eyes. "Kendall came to pick up Kevin. And I heard him say he still loves me."

"Then maybe you should tell him you still love him," she said softly.

"But he hurt me so much," I said. "I shouldn't love him like I do. "

She shrugged and left my room. I turned my radio on.

"_Dance hard, laugh more. Turn the music up now. Party like a Rockstar. Can I get a what now? I swear I'll do anything that I have to till I forget about you!"_

I turned the radio off.

Kendall was everywhere. He was on the cover of every teen magazine. He was on the internet. On binders and folders. Eventually I was going to have to face him whether I liked it or not.

_***Kendall's P.O.V***_

"You know, if you still love her, then tell her," Kevin said. "By the way she acted tonight, I think she still loves you, too."

"There's no way she can still love me after how much I hurt her," I said.

"But it wouldn't hurt to try," he said. "You never know. You just might be passing up the chance to get her back."

"I doubt she'll just start talking to me again."

"Then apologize. You hurt her. Fix it. Now. Go to her house."

He put the car keys in my hand and pushed me out the door.

"But-" He shut the door and locked it. I walked to my car. "I guess it's now or never."

_***LeeAnn's P.O.V***_

It was almost midnight and I was still lying awake on my bed. I heard a car pull up. I glanced out my window.

"It can't be," I whispered.

It was Kendall's car. He got out and walked to my door and rang the doorbell. I ran downstairs and answered the door.

"Kendall?" I asked, confused. "Did Kevin forget something or…?"

"No, no, it's just me," he said. "I just needed to talk to you."

"Oh," I said, "come in."

We sat on the couch.

"What did you-"

"LeeAnn, I'm sorry," Kendall blurted out before I could finish. "I'm so so _so _sorry. I never should've left you last year. It was the biggest mistake of my life. I was miserable all tour. I cried myself to sleep almost every night. I thought about you ever day. I've missed you so much. And seeing you tonight killed me inside. I saw the look in your eyes when you saw me. I saw the pain. I needed to apologize. I needed to talk to you. I needed to see you. I just needed to be with you again."

"Kendall," I said, tears in my eyes, "I don't know what to say. I've felt the same way this past year."

We both stood up.

"LeeAnn, I love you," Kendall said.

Before I could say anything, Kendall pulled me in and kissed me.

_**I know it changes point of views a lot. Sorry. I just needed it to show the situation from different sides. **_

_**I'm sorry it took so long to update. I'll probably update a couple of times this week. Especially if I get reviews… ;) Hint hint.**_

_**So… Love you all 3**_

_**-Xoxo, LeeAnn**_


	3. Chapter 3: Big Time Couple

I pushed him away after a few seconds.

"Kendall," I said. "I don't know if I can do this. You hurt me that night. Bad. I'm not sure if I'm ready to just jump back into this relationship."

"I understand," he said sadly.

"I'm sorry," I said. "Maybe after some time of knowing that you don't hate me, I'll actually be able to accept it."

"I'll wait," he said. "I'll wait as long as it takes. But please, don't ignore me. Talk to me at least."

"I'll have to see." I walked to the door. "Maybe you should leave now."

"Promise you'll think about it."

"I promise," I said softly. "Goodbye, Kendall."

"Goodbye, LeeAnn."

_***Kendall's P.O.V***_

I called Logan.

"Hello?" Logan said.

"Are the guys still awake?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said, "Why?"

"I'm coming over," I said. "I need to talk to you." I hung up.

I pulled up to Logan's house and walked in.

"What's up?" James asked.

"I kissed LeeAnn," I said.

Logan spit out the water he was drinking. "What?"

"I apologized and I kissed her," I said. "She pushed me away."

"What'd she say?" Carlos asked.

"She said she wasn't to jump back into a relationship with me," I said softly. "She said I hurt her too much."

"Dude, that sucks," James said. Logan hit him on the back of the head.

"Did she say no completely?" Logan said.

"She said she'd think about it."

My phone rang. Unknown number. "Hello?"

"Kendall? It's LeeAnn. Can you come back to my house?"

_***LeeAnn's P.O.V***_

As soon as Kendall left, I realized how big of a mistake I had made. I texted Kevin for his number and called him.

"Kendall?" I said. "It's LeeAnn. Can you come back to my house?"

"Of course," he said. "I'm on my way."

I hung up.

I waited by the window and watched Kendall walk up to the door. I opened it before he knocked and embraced him.

"I love you," I said with my head buried in his chest. "And I'm sorry for earlier."

"I love you, too," he said. "And you have no reason to be sorry."

I looked up at him and kissed him. He hugged me tighter.

"I've missed you so much," he whispered into my hair.

"I've missed you, too," I said. "More than you can imagine."

We walked to the couch and sat down. He pulled me into his lap.

"I was gone for so long," he said.

I laughed. "You didn't miss much. I dyed my hair black, cut it, and I turned 16. Oh, and I started singing and playing piano."

"Maybe we can duet sometime," he said smiling. "Nothing really changed for me either. I turned 19."

"And you became famous worldwide. No big deal or anything."

"No big deal."

I glanced at my phone. It was 2 A.M. Kendall noticed.

'I can go home if you need me to," he said.

"No," I said holding onto his arm. "Stay. My mom won't care. We can just talk until we fall asleep."

"Sounds good to me." He smiled and kissed my forehead.

Kendall held me all night. It felt good to talk to him again. It felt good to have him hold me again. It felt good to sleep in his arms. Everything just felt _right._

_***Jessica's P.O.V***_

I walked into LeeAnn's house. She was asleep on the couch in Kendall's arm. I took a picture.

"Awe, they're so cute," I said quietly.

Someone knocked on the door.

"Hey," Kevin said when I opened it. "Kendall never came home last night and LeeAnn asked me for his number. Is he here?"

"Go look on the couch," I said.

Kevin walked around the corner. "Whoa!" I heard a thunk. I ran into the living room and LeeAnn on the floor.

"Was that really necessary?" LeeAnn asked while rubbing her head.

"After yesterday, I wasn't expecting to see this!" Kevin replied.

_***LeeAnn's P.O.V***_

When Kevin said that, I was already back in Kendall's lap.

"You're the one who told me to apologize," Kendall said. "So I did."

"The best apology I've ever gotten," I mumbled. Kendall smiled at me.

"I just wanted you to stop whining and crying," Kevin said. Kendall threw a pillow at him.

"We'll let you two catch up," Jessica said pulling Kevin to the door. "Call you later!"

"Bye," I said laughing. I looked at Kendall. "You cried often enough to bother Kevin?"

"Yeah," he admitted. "I cried a lot."

"I did, too," I said laying my head on his shoulder. "Probably a lot more than you."

"Oh, don't tell me that," he groaned. "I already feel bad enough."

"Well it's true."

"I still feel so horrible for leaving you," he said quietly.

"Don't worry about that," I said putting my arms around him. "You have me now and that's all that matters. Ignore the past."

"You're right," he said smiling. "Besides right now, nothing even matters."

"Nothing even matters," I agreed.

We kissed.

"I've missed this so much," I said.

"Missed what?" he asked.

"This," I said holding onto him tighter. "I've missed being with you. Kissing you. Hugging you. And I've really missed you holding me." He pulled me closer.

"I've missed this, too," he said. "I've missed kissing you and talking to you. And I've missed holding you in my arms."

His phone went off.

"My mom says I need to come home," he said sadly.

"We can hang out later today, too," I reminded him, "but before you go, I need your current number. I didn't save it when I called you."

"I didn't save yours either," he said. "Where's your phone?"

"Upstairs."

"Just give me your number and I'll text you."

I gave him my number as we walked to the door. He hugged me.

"I don't want to leave," he said.

"I don't want you to leave, either," I said," but your mom needs you. Go. I'll have my mom drop me off at your house later."

"Sounds like a plan," he said. "I'll call you later."

"I'll answer."

He kissed me and turned to walk out the door. I went to walk upstairs.

"Wait, LeeAnn?"

I walked back over to him. "Yes?"

"I love you," he said smiling. I hugged him.

"I love you, too, Kendall," I said smiling.

As soon as I walked into my room, I heard my phone go off. There was a text from an unknown number.

"_I miss you already. I love you so much, sweetie 3"_

I smiled to myself and hit reply.

"_I miss you, too, Kendall. And I love you so much 3"_

_****Author's note:**_

_**Here's chapter 3.**_

_**I know, it's not good. But I really don't care.**_

_**There's not much to say.**_

_**Hope you enjoy.**_

_**-Xoxo, LeeAnn**_


	4. Chapter 4: Big Time Paparazzi

"So you and Kendall are officially back together?" Jessica asked. She was practically bouncing out of her seat.

"Yes," I said smiling, "we are. He came over about an hour after you left. He told me he needed to talk to me. He said he was miserable all tour and that he missed me. Then he told me he loved me and then he just kissed me!"

"Awe," Jessica said, "that's so cute!"

"But I told him no," I said. "I told him I wasn't ready to be back with him."

"But you're-"

"Then I realized that I loved him and got him to come back over. And then we fell asleep and you know the rest."

"I'm so glad you two are happy together. I didn't want to watch you suffer anymore."

"Was I really that bad?" I asked.

"Yeah," Jessica said, "you were so depressed. I was scared for you."

"I couldn't have been that bad."

"LeeAnn, you ended up in the hospital." I was quiet. "Did you tell Kendall about that?"

"No," I answered quickly. "No, no, no. I can't tell him about that. He already feels bad enough."

_***Kendall's P.O.V***_

"I'm on my way," I said to LeeAnn as I got in my car. "I'll be there in about 5 minutes."

"OK," she said. "I love you, Kendall."

I smiled. "I love you, too."

On the drive to LeeAnn's house, I tried to think of ways to tell LeeAnn I was leaving tomorrow. I was only going to be gone for 4 days, but I didn't want to leave her at all. It would kill her.

As soon as I walked up to LeeAnn's door, she threw the door open and jumped into my arms.

"It's a good thing I have fast reflexes," I laughed.

"I was hoping that hadn't changed about you," she said laughing with me, "or else I'd be on the concrete!"

I carried her to the couch and sat down.

"LeeAnn, there's something I need to tell you," I said.

Her face fell. "That doesn't sound good."

"It's really not. I have to go to New York. Tomorrow." She was shocked. "I'll only be gone for 4 days, though."

"I guess four days isn't so bad," she said sadly. "If this is what it takes to have you back, I'll deal with it." She was glancing at her wrists. There were red marks.

"What's that?" I asked reaching for her wrist.

She pulled away. "Nothing," she said. I grabbed her arm and looked.

"LeeAnn," I said softly." Why?"

"I told you. This past year was hard for me."

"But this hard?"

"Kendall, I ended up in the hospital. Twice."

My jaw dropped. I was at a loss for words. "Why?"

She looked down, tears in her eyes. "Attempted suicides," she whispered. "Once was cutting and the other was trying to starve myself."

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked while pulling her close.

"I didn't want you to know," she sobbed. "You already felt bad. I didn't want you to feel worse."

"I can't believe you almost died because of me."

She leaned back and wiped her face. "But I didn't," she said with a weak smile. "I'm still here. And we're together. Nothing else even matters, remember?"

"Nothing even matters," I said weakly.

_***LeeAnn's P.O.V***_

"I'll miss you," I said to Kendall outside of the airport, "so so much."

"I'll miss you, too," he said hugging me. "I'll call you every day. I promise."

"You better, or else," I said jokingly.

"I can't believe I just got you back and I have to leave already," he said sadly.

"It's OK, Kendall," I said. "You're not losing me. I'll still be right here waiting for you when you get back."

"Kendall, we gotta go," Logan called from the door. Kendall sighed.

"I guess I'll see you in four days," he said with tears in his eyes.

"Four days," I repeated. "I love you, Kendall."

"I love you, too, LeeAnn," he said. He pulled me in for a kiss.

I walked back to my car where my mom was waiting.

"LeeAnn," my mom said, "it's only four days. Not four years."

"But I just got him back," I said wiping tears from my eyes. "Can you drop me off at Jessica's house?"

"Sure."

When Jessica opened the door, she dragged me upstairs.

"You're on the front page of OceanUp!" she yelled.

"What are you talking about?" I asked. She pointed at the computer screen. "Wha… That just happened! I just left the airport!"

On the screen, there were pictures of me and Kendall outside the airport. The biggest picture, at the top of the page, was me and Kendall kissing. Below was the caption "_Kendall's new GF?" _

"This is insane!" Jessica. "You're dating someone famous. You're going to become famous!"

"Why do I have a feeling this is just going to get worse over time?" I said. Then something clicked. "That's why Kendall left me."

"What are you talking about?"

I looked at her. "Kendall told me the night we got back together. He left me because he didn't want me to deal with stuff like this."

"So he left you because he thought it would be better for you?"

I smiled. "He never stopped caring about me."

_***Kendall's P.O.V.***_

"Hey, Kendall," Carlos said walking up to me, "have you checked OceanUp today?"

"No," I said, "why?"

"You're on the front page with LeeAnn," he said walking away.

"What? No way." I ran to my laptop and looked. "Awe, crap."

My phone rang. It was LeeAnn.

"Hello, darling," I said.

"Hello," LeeAnn said. "So. Have you been online lately?"

"I have, actually," I said.

"So you've seen the OceanUp home page?"

"Yeah. I'm so sorry about that, LeeAnn."

She laughed. "It's fine, Kendall. I'm glad the world knows I love you. It's a good thing."

"So you're not mad?" I asked with relief.

"Not at all."

There was an awkward silence. She sighed.

"I wish I could hug you right now," she said sadly. "I miss you so much."

"I miss you, too," I said. "But only three more days and I'll be home. And we'll spend all day, every day, together."

"That sounds amazing," she sighed. I could tell she was smiling. I smiled, too.

"Kendall, we have to leave!" I heard James yell.

"I have to go, LeeAnn," I said frowning.

"Awe. Bye, Kendall. I love you."

I smiled. "I love you, too, LeeAnn. I'll call you tomorrow. And are you sure you're not mad?"

She laughed again. "I'm positive, Kendall."

"I'm just warning you that this will happen a lot."

"I'm prepared."

I sighed. "Welcome to the life of dating a pop star."

_****Author's note:**_

_**So. This chapter is a little shorter than the others. But oh well.**_

_**I'd rather have a good, short chapter than a long, stupid one.**_

_**I don't really have much to say. So I'm gonna go now.**_

_**Reviews? :]**_

_**-Xoxo, LeeAnn**_


	5. Chapter 5: Big Time Protection

_***LeeAnn's P.O.V***_

"LeeAnn," Jessica said, "calm down. Kendall's flight will be in tomorrow morning."

"But I want to be there when he gets off the plane!" I whined.

"You're mom is not going to take you to the airport at 3 in the morning," Jessica pointed out. "And she won't take you now."

I smiled. "But you can take me up there!" I exclaimed. "I can say that I'm staying at your house and you can drop me off! You can take me at midnight for all I care. I just really want to be there."

"I'm not sure, LeeAnn," she said.

"Please? Please please please ple-"

"Fine!" she yelled. "I'll take you at like 2. But I am not taking you home, too."

"I'll go to Kendall's afterwards," I said hugging her. "Thank you so much!"

I kept glancing at the clock. 2:54 A.M.

"Flight 270 from New York has landed," the announcer said.

I jumped out of my seat and ran to the door. I saw him walking and smiled. I stood by the chauffeurs and held up a sign that said _Kendall Schmidt __ . _

Logan was the first one to see me. He poked Carlos and pointed at me. They started laughing. I laughed, too.

"What's funny?" I heard Kendall ask. Logan pointed at me. James and Kendall both looked. Kendall's face lit up with a smile. He started walking to me. I met him halfway.

"Hello, Mr. Schmidt," I said. "How are you this fine morning?"

"I'm doing fine," he said laughing. "Especially since my pick up is beautiful."

I dropped my sign and hugged him.

"I've missed you so much, Kendall," I said into his chest. He hugged me tighter.

"I've missed you, too," he said. "How did you get your mom to bring you up here?"

I looked down. "She doesn't know I'm here. She thinks I'm at Jessica's house."

Kendall gave me a look of disappointment. "LeeAnn."

"I just really wanted to be here to see you when you got off the plane. And I can go home with you and you can take me home tomorrow. Well, later today."

"How long have you been here?"

I glanced at the clock. 3:15. "About an hour and a half."

"By yourself?" he asked. I nodded. "LeeAnn, that's not safe. Something could've happened to you."

I laughed. "Calm down, Kendall. It's nice of you to worry, but I'm OK. I won't do it again."

"Good." He grabbed my hands and leaned his forehead onto mine. "I don't want anything bad to happen to you." He kissed my nose.

"Sorry to break up the little love fest," James said walking up, "actually, I'm not, but can we go home? Your luggage is right here."

Kendall kissed me. "Go away, James," he mumbled against my lips.

"We will leave you, bro," Logan said. "Don't think we won't."

Kendall pulled away, obviously annoyed.

"Kendall," I whispered. "We'll be together all day. Calm down."

Kendall smiled.

"Ugh, we don't want to hear about your plans for tonight," James said.

"Relax, Maslow," I said pushing him, "we aren't doing anything like that."

"Whatever you say, Gunter," James said pushing me back.

I laughed. "I've missed you guys." I hugged them.

"We've missed you, too," Carlos said. "Kendall was annoying us the entire flight home."

"I'm pretty sure I annoyed Jessica pretty badly," I said laughing. "That's probably why she agreed to bring me up here."

"I'm glad she did," Kendall said wrapping his arms around my waist.

"Can we leave now?" James whined. He was getting agitated. "I'm tired and I want to go home."

"Awe, let's go before Maslow cries," I joked.

"Very funny," he said rolling his eyes. "Let's just go.

I laid by Kendall in his bed and cuddled up next to him. "I love you."

"I love you, too," he whispered into my ear, "so so much."

"I think it's adorable how protective you are," I said.

He leaned back to look at my face. "What are you talking about?"

"At the airport," I said. "You were being protective. You were worried about me being there alone. It was cute."

"Of course I was worried," he said. He put his hand on my cheek. "You're my baby girl. You're barely 16. I don't want anything bad to happen to you. I couldn't imagine what I'd do if you got hurt."

"You're so sweet," I said. "I can't imagine how badly you would've freaked out when I was in the hospital."

He tensed. "If I would've been here, you wouldn't have been in the hospital. I still can't believe how stupid I was. I'm sorry, LeeAnn. I rea-"

I put my hand over his mouth. "Don't be. Right now, just be happy that we are together. Besides right here and right now, nothing even matters."

"Nothing even matters," he repeated.

I laid my head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat. He started singing very softly.

"Cause the world stops when I put my arms around ya, around ya. Whoa oh. Cause nothing even matters. Nothing even matters. They can all talk; say what they want about us, about us. Whoa oh. Cause nothing even matters. Nothing even matters."

"That's beautiful," I said. "Did you just come up with that?"

"Not really," he said. I felt him shrug. "I've been experimenting with that phrase ever since you said it the first time."

"Well, I love it," I said smiling. "It's sweet. Just like you."

Kendall lifted me up to look him in the eyes. I leaned into kiss him.

At first, it was slow and romantic. It started to heat up. Kendall was still wearing his button up shirt he wore on the plane. I reached for the buttons and started to undo them. I was halfway done when Kendall grabbed my hands.

"Stop," he said.

"What?" I said still breathless.

"LeeAnn, are you sure you want to do this?" he asked. "I don't want you to regret this."

"I'm positive," I said, "as long as you want to. I'm ready, Kendall. I've been-"

Kendall cut me off with a kiss. He rolled over so that I was laying on top of him as he reached for the hem of my shirt.

****Author's note:**

**I didn't go into the smut cause I suck at it. But here ya go. Chapter five!**

**Read, review, enjoy!**

**-Xoxo, LeeAnn**


	6. Chapter 6: Big Time Immaturity

_***Kendall's P.O.V***_

I woke up when the sun started shining through the window. I rolled over and saw LeeAnn laying on her stomach. I smiled.

Somebody knocked on my door.

"Kendall," Carlos said, "you awake?"

"Uh, yeah," I said loudly. "Hold on." I reached over to cover LeeAnn up and then cover myself up.

Carlos walked in. "Logan wants to know what you guys… want… for… breakfast," he said. His voice slowed at the end of his sentence. He glanced at LeeAnn and then to the pile of clothes on the ground. "What happened in here when we got home?"

"Nothing of your concern," I said even though he already knew. "Tell Logan it doesn't matter. Now leave." I threw a pillow at him. He closed the door before it hit him. LeeAnn stirred and woke up. "Morning, beautiful."

"Morning," she said while yawning. She sat up and noticed her shirt on the ground. She blushed and pulled the blanket over her. "Oh my gosh."

"Calm down," I said laughing. "It's OK." I kissed her forehead.

"Did that really happen?" she asked staring into space.

"Yes," I said, "it did. It really happened, LeeAnn."

She started smiling. "Wow."

"Logan has breakfast for us downstairs," I said standing up. "They're waiting on us."

"OK," she said. She stood up and groaned.

"What?" I asked walking over to her.

"Nothing, nothing. It's just that…. I'm just…. Sore."

I thought about it. "Oh, I get it."

_***LeeAnn's P.O.V***_

When we walked downstairs, the boys got quiet. Carlos was stifling a laugh. I walked over to Kendall.

"Do they know?" I whispered.

He ignored me. He was glaring at Carlos.

"So, uh," James said breaking the silence, "how did you two sleep?"

Carlos lost it and started laughing.

"Carlos!" Logan said. "We were supposed to act cool!"

I could tell my face was bright red.

"Oh, wow, LeeAnn," James said laughing, "you're blushing so bad! Don't be embarrassed. Sex is a natural process."

"James!" Kendall yelled. "Shut up!"

"Kendall," I said, "it's OK."

He put his arms around my waist. "Do you want to go somewhere else?"

"Kendall, I'm fine," I said. "Less walking is better."

Logan looked at me and laughed.

"I'm gonna go to my car,' Kendall said. When he was gone, James starting laughing.

"Wow," I said. "You guys are a bunch of kindergarteners. Yes. Kendall and I had sex and I'm sore!"

Carlos spit his milk out and started laughing. Logan fell out of his chair.

"Oh, wow," Logan said standing up, "this is great. This is just great."

"You guys are so immature," I said rolling my eyes. "You're 20 and you still laugh at the word sex."

"I keep forgetting you're only 16," James said. "It's so weird."

"You're so weird." I threw a donut at him. "I'm going upstairs." I went to Kendall's room and looked out the window. Kendall was laying on his car talking on his phone. I took the time to call Jessica. She answered right away.

"Hello?"

"Oh my gosh, Jessica," I said. "You're never gonna believe what happened."

"You didn't get kidnapped at the airport, did you?" she asked jokingly.

"No," I said. "This is serious, Jess. When Kendall and I got home, we laid on his bed. We were just talking. Then we started kissing and the next thing I know, I'm waking up with my clothes in a pile on the ground!"

She gasped. "LeeAnn, you didn't!"

"I did," I said falling back onto the bed. "I did. I can't believe it."

"How was it?" she asked.

I scoffed. "Great. Wonderful. Amazing. Incredible."

"So you don't regret it?"

"Of course I don't regret it!" I said sitting up. "I wouldn't ever regret it. I love Kendall with all my heart. So why should I?"

"Then I don't see what the big deal is. Just don't let your brother know."

"I guess you're right. And Dean would kill me and Kendall! He already doesn't like Kendall for leaving me last year."

"LeeAnn!" James yelled from downstairs.

"Ugh, the guys are being so immature. I have to go downstairs. Call you later. Bye."

"Bye."

I ran downstairs. "What, James?"

"Kendall wanted to know where you were," James shrugged.

"I told you I was going upstairs, idiot," I said.

"You threw a donut at me and that's all I was focused on," he said.

"You're such a freak," Kendall said. "You're so obsessed with food."

"Food is my best friend."

Kendall rolled his eyes and turned to face me. "Did you have a good breakfast?"

"I haven't eaten yet," I admitted. "These retards wouldn't shut up."

"Then he now," he said pushing me towards the table.

_***Kendall's P.O.V***_

"I've never met a girl who can eat as much as you can, LeeAnn," Logan said.

"I grew up with Kendall," she said shrugging, "what do you expect?"

"Hey," I said defensively, "I don't eat that much."

"Yes you do," she said. "You eat a lot."

"She's right, bro," James said.

"I should probably go home," LeeAnn said glancing at the clock. She frowned.

"I'll take you home," I said standing up.

"I'll meet you upstairs." She stood on her toes and kissed me.

"Does she still talk to her brother?" Carlos asked.

"I don't know," I said. "Why?"

"Cause he's freakishly protective," he said. "He would kill you if he found out that you're doing his sister."

"He won't find out then," I said walking towards my room. I didn't see LeeAnn anywhere. "LeeAnn?"

Her voice came from my closet. "In here!"

"Why are you in there?" I asked.

"Trying to find a hoodie," she said poking her head around the corner. "Ah-hah!"

She walked out wearing my black hoodie. I laughed.

"What?" she asked frowning.

"It's huge on you," I laughed.

"Then stop being fat," she said.

"I am not fat," I said.

"Bet."

I tackled her onto the bed and started tickling her.

"Say it!" I said.

"Alright, alright!" she said trying to push me off of her. "I give up. You're not fat! You're not fat!"

I stopped and laid down next to her. She was still laughing. I kissed her forehead.

"I love you, LeeAnn," I said.

"I love you, too, Kendall," she said.

****Author's note:**

**I know, crappy ending. **

**I'm thinking about adding in some hostility between LeeAnn and James. I'm not sure yet.**

**-Xoxo, LeeAnn**


	7. Chapter 7: Big Time Big Brother

_***LeeAnn's P.O.V***_

"Mom, I'm home!" I yelled walking through the door.

"Mom's at the store," a male voice said coming from the living room.

I gasped. "Dean?"

"Shit," I heard Kendall whisper. I ignored it and ran to the living room.

Dean was sitting on the couch smiling. "Hey little sister."

"Dean!" I yelled hugging him. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you, too," he said kissing my cheek. He looked at the doorway. Kendall was standing there awkwardly. "What is he doing here?" he asked harshly.

"He's here with me," I said walking over to Kendall. I grabbed his hand.

"Isn't this the jerk who left you last year?" he asked.

Kendall tensed.

"Don't start, Dean," I said. "We'll be in my room."

"Wait. Mom wouldn't approve of her sixteen year old daughter having a guy in her room."

I rolled my eyes. "Mom would be perfectly OK with it."

I pulled Kendall upstairs to my room and locked the door. He sat on my bed. I sat in his lap.

"Sorry about that, Kendall," I said. "He wasn't very happy last year."

"I don't think he's ever liked me honestly," Kendall said. "He would really hate me if he found out about last night."

"I don't even want to think about how dead we would _both _be," I said shuddering. "That would be horrible."

I pushed Kendall backwards and laid my head on his chest. I yawned.

"Tired?" he asked laughing.

"Well we got home at four and up at eight," I said, "and you and I both know we didn't sleep for all 4 of those hours."

"Yeah," he said, "but it was worth losing that sleep."

I smiled and blushed. "It was, wasn't it?"

There was a silence.

"Kendall?" I said.

He was playing with my hair. "Yes sweetie?"

"I love you."

Kendall kissed my head. "I love you, too, baby girl."

"You're so adorable," I said laughing. "You and your nicknames."

"Well you are my baby girl," he said pulling me closer. "That's what I'm gonna call you."

"Awe," I said smiling. "I have to come up with a nickname for you."

"Whatever works for you."

I leaned in to kiss him when my doorknob jiggled. I sighed.

"LeeAnn, open the door," Dean said loudly.

I walked over to my door. Dean pulled me through it as soon as it opened.

"What were you two doing in there that you had to lock the door?" Dean asked with obvious anger in his voice.

"Calm yourself," I said. "We weren't doing anything. I just didn't want you in there with us. It's no big deal, Dean. The night of my birthday, Kendall stayed the night for crying out loud!"

"How could mom approve of this?"

"Because mom trusts me!" I yelled. "She trusts me unlike you. I understand that you're worried, but don't be. Kendall will take care of me."

"If he's so good, then why did he leave you last year?" Dean yelled.

"He thought it would be better for me!" I yelled back. "He didn't mean to hurt me, Dean! And he's changed. He won't hurt me again."

Dean was fuming. "If you're both so good, then why is there a hickey on your neck?"

My hand flew up to my neck. "Why should it matter?"

"Because you're sixteen!"

"Exactly! I'm not a little girl anymore, Dean!"

I walked into my room and locked my door ignoring Dean's yelling. Kendall was looking down and twiddling his thumbs.

"Sorry about that," I said laying down beside him.

"Maybe I should go home," he said sitting up.

I pushed him back down. "No. I don't want you to leave. Ignore him."

"I understand why he hates me. I hurt you so much last year."

"Kendall, I'm going to slap you."

Kendall jerked up. "Why?"

"I'm tired of dwelling on the past!" I said irritated. "I don't care what anybody thinks about me getting back with you. I really don't. I love you and that's all that's all that matters. So who cares about last year? Stop thinking and talking about it. Just stop!" By the time I finished, I was crying.

Kendall pulled me into his lap and I laid my head on his chest. "Shhh," he said rubbing my back. "I'm sorry. I won't bring it up again. I promise I'll try."

"K-Kendall," I said wiping my nose," you just can't do it anymore. That was a dark time for me and I don't like to think about it. I don't want to go back to that."

"You don't have to," Kendall whispered. "I'm here for you. I promise. I won't hurt you again."

I looked up into Kendall's eyes and got lost in them. "I trust you," I finally whispered back.

Kendall laid down and pulled me with him.

_***Kendall's P.O.V***_

Seeing LeeAnn cry killed me inside. I couldn't handle it knowing it was my fault.

That moment I realized how emotional LeeAnn was. It was all my fault. If I'd never left her, she would have never gone into depression. She would still be happy.

"I love you, Kendall," she said quietly.

"I love you, too, LeeAnn," I said.

LeeAnn eventually fell asleep in my arms leaving me to think.

LeeAnn was very emotional. One little thing could set her off. I have to be super careful. And I have to warn the guys to be careful. I hate watching LeeAnn cry and I didn't it to be my fault.

_***LeeAnn's P.O.V***_

"_Kendall doesn't love you anymore," James said. _

"_No one loves you anymore," Logan said._

_I looked around. Kendall was laughing at me from the corner._

"_You're so pathetic," he said walking towards me. He circled me. "How did you think this relationship would ever work? You're too needy."_

"_But, Kendall," I said sadly, "I love you. And I know you love me back."_

_Kendall laughed. "I've never loved you."_

"_That's a lie!"_

I sat up with tears falling down my face. I was sobbing hard.

Kendall sat up, too. "LeeAnn, what's wrong?" he asked. I flinched when he put his arm around me.

"Promise me you love me," I sobbed. He tried to speak, but I stopped him. "Just promise."

"I promise I love you," he said rocking me. "I promise.

Kendall held me as I sobbed into his chest.

****Author's note:**

**Here's chapter 7! :)**

**Hope you enjoy.**

…**And I hope you review…. ;)**

**-Xoxo LeeAnn**


	8. Chapter 8: Big Time Breakup?

'Are you OK?" Kendall asked when I calmed down. "What was that about?"

"A bad dream," I said wiping tears off my face. "A horrible, horrible dream."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"You were there," I said, "and James and Logan, too. James said you didn't love me. Logan said no one loved me. Then you were laughing at me. And you said that you never loved me and that our relationship would never work. And-and-" I started crying.

"Hey, hey," he said while lifting my chin," look at me. Don't you ever doubt the fact that I love you. I never stopped loving you. I love you more than you can imagine. Don't plan on that changing. Do not let anybody tell you differently. Ever."

Kendall's eyes were tearing up. I leaned forward and embraced him in a tight hug.

"I love you so much," I whispered.

"I love you, too," he whispered back. "What would make you dream that?"

"My abandonment problems," I said. "And I'm clinically depressed. And my anxiety. I could probably go all day with all of my medical problems."

Kendall didn't say anything, but I could tell he was thinking about last year. He bit his lip and looked down.

"Kendall," I said softly, "look at me. I'm OK. I'll be fine. Don't worry about me."

"How can I not worry?" he asked quietly. "There's so much to worry about."

"No, there's not," I said sternly. "I have medicine, but I haven't taken them. That's probably why I had the dream."

"Why haven't you taken them?"

"I was with you," I said. "I didn't think I would need them."

A knock on my door made us jump.

"LeeAnn," my mom said loudly, "dinner is ready."

"Should I leave?" Kendall asked.

"No no no," I said. "Stay. Unless you want to leave."

He leaned forward and kissed me. "Why would I want to leave you?"

"Then let's go." I grabbed his hand and pulled him downstairs.

"Hello, Kendall," my mom said smiling.

"Hi, Mrs. Gunter," Kendall said, smiling as well.

"Kendall," she said, "you've known me long enough. You can call me Carolyn."

Kendall laughed. "OK."

Dean didn't say anything. He only glared at Kendall.

"So, how was tour, Kendall?" my mom asked.

"It was a lot of fun," Kendall said. "I got to go to a lot of places I've never been before."

"I'm glad you had fun," Dean said sarcastically.

My mom gave him a hard look. "Dean."

"What?" Dean asked loudly. "Am I supposed to be happy for him? While he was out having fun, my sister was here dying because of him. Yeah, I'm so damn happy for him!"

"Dean, shut up!" I yelled standing up. "Just shut up! People make mistakes. It happens. So just drop it. Now!"

Everyone was staring at me. No one spoke. Kendall was looking down, but I could tell there were tears in his eyes.

"Maybe I should go," he said quietly.

"Please," Dean mumbled. I shot him a look.

Kendall headed for the front door. I got up and grabbed his hand.

"No, maybe _we_ should go," I said. "Mom, if you need me, I'll be at Kendall's."

"You can't seriously be letting her go," Dean said.

"Dean, drop it," my mom said. She looked at me. "Call me when you're on your way home."

By the time we reached Kendall's house, tears were on his cheeks.

"Kendall," I said softly, wiping the tears away, "don't cry. Ignore Dean. He doesn't matter. Nothing even matters."

"LeeAnn," he said, "I can't ignore it. There's no way to ignore it. Dean will bring it up all the time. When I look into your eyes, I can see the pain. I can see how much you hurt. I can see the cuts on your arms. And all of this is my fault. It's all my fault!"

"Kendall!" I said loudly. "You have to stop this! I'm not hurting anymore. I'm not cutting anymore. Because of you. You came back, Kendall. You saved me."

"You treat me like I'm an angel."

I rolled my eyes. "You are to me! You're this amazing, gorgeous, caring, loving person and for some reason, you picked me to love over everybody else. It was a miracle."

"I should be saying that about you. I'm lucky you love me."

I grabbed his hand. "I do. I really do, but I can't be around you if you keep talking like this! I don't think about last year. I don't like to. The main reason you see the pain is because you keep bringing up last year!"

"I always cause you pain," he whispered.

"Ugh!" I screamed.

I got out of the car and walked inside. I slammed the door.

"Someone's pissed," James said. "What happened?"

"Kendall has **got **to get over last year!" I yelled. "I'm so tired of him bringing it up. It makes me want to scream!"

"Like you are now?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said, my voice returning to normal," sorry. I'm just mad. I can't stand it when he does that."

"I don't blame you. It would piss me off, too."

Kendall walked through the door. James and I were quiet. He sat on the couch beside me and James went upstairs.

"I'm sorry," Kendall said quietly.

"You said you wouldn't do it," I said. "You promised you wouldn't talk about it. I can't handle this."

"I'm sorry," he repeated, "I really am. It's just… the scars on your arms are a constant reminder that I almost killed you."

"Kendall," I said, "this relationship is the best thing that's ever happened to me. I honestly don't know what I'd do without you. But I can't do this, Kendall. I can't be with you if all you're going to do is dwell on the past."

"Are… are you breaking up with me?" he asked softly.

My heart ached. Kendall's expression was heart breaking. "I don't know, Kendall. I don't want to. I really don't. It's just that I can't handle being reminded of the past."

"I promise, I won't ta-"

"You've already made that promise, Kendall!" I cut him off. "How am I supposed to know if you'll actually keep it this time?"

"I will, LeeAnn."

"You said that last time."

"I'll work on it!" He sounded desperate. "Please. Just don't leave."

"That's exactly what you'll have to do. Work on it." I walked upstairs and knocked on the first door on the left.

"LeeAnn?" Logan asked, noticing the tears building up in my eyes. "What's wrong?"

I opened my mouth to speak, but only a sob came out. The tears spilled over and Logan hugged me. He pulled me to his bed and I sat in his lap while I cried.

****Author's note:**

**Here's chapter 8! I don't know why it took me so long to update… I've had this written! I'll probably have chapter 9 up by the end of the week!**

**Reviews would be nice :)**

**-Xoxo L**


	9. Chapter 9: Big Time Makeup

"LeeAnn, just calm down and tell me what's wrong," Logan said wiping tears off my face.

"I think me and Kendall just broke up," I said through my crying.

"What do you mean you think you broke up?" he asked.

"I-I don't know," I sobbed. "I really don't. We were arguing a-and I told him I couldn't be with him if he dwells on the past. Then he asked me if I was dumping him."

"What'd you say?"

"I told him that I didn't know and that I didn't want to, but I couldn't handle it."

"You need to go talk to him," he said softly. "Go. Now. I don't want to see you like this."

"I-I can't," I said. "I can't just go back. I don't want him to think I'm not upset with him when I am."

"You don't have to get back with him. Just talk to him. Let him knows what's going on."

I sighed. "It'll start like that. Then we'll both start crying. Then I'll look into his beautiful green eyes and I'll get lost and forget everything. And then tomorrow, it'll be the same thing all over again."

"Do you want me to talk to him for you?" he asked. I nodded sheepishly. He sighed and walked to the door.

"Thank you, Logan," I said sweetly.

"Yeah, yeah," he muttered.

_**-*Kendall's P.O.V*-**_

When I heard someone coming down the stairs, I tried to calm down. It was no use.

"Kendall, what's your deal?" Logan asked plopping down beside me.

"What are you talking about?"

"You wanted her back so bad," he said, "and now that you've got her back, you're blowing it."

"I know, I know," I mumbled.

"You need to fix this," he said sternly. "She came upstairs and literally collapsed in my arms crying, Kendall. She's laying on my bed right now and she's still crying. She doesn't want to lose you."

"I don't want to lose her, either!" I said quickly.

"Then go talk to her! This needs to be fixed. I don't like seeing her like this and I know you sure as hell don't, either. So go upstairs. Talk to her."

"It seems like every time I try to fix something, I make it worse."

"Then just go upstairs and hold her. She needs to calm down before she hyperventilates and passes out. Go. Now."

He pushed me off the couch and I trudged up the stairs. I stood outside Logan's door. I could hear LeeAnn crying. I cringed.

When I opened the door, she didn't even look up. Her head was buried in a pillow. I walked over to her and pulled her into my lap.

"Shhh," I whispered. "It's OK, baby girl."

She realized it was me and not Logan and tried to push me away. I held tighter.

"Shhh," I repeated. "Calm down."

"What do you want, Kendall?" she sobbed.

"I want you to stop crying, calm down, and breathe," I said. "You're gonna pass out."

"I'll b-be just f-fine," she hiccupped. "I promise. Just g-go."

"I'm not leaving until you calm down and we work this out."

"I don't' want to talk about it, Kendall," she mumbled, her tears slowing.

"Yeah, well I do. I don't like seeing you like this. I don't want you to cry."

"If you don't want to see it, then don't watch."

I sighed. "Do you really not want me here?"

She sighed, too. "It's not that, Kendall. It's just that… we get into an argument and then we try to talk things out. But I get lost in your big green eyes and I just give in. And then it happens all over again a week later, Kendall."

"Then look down when we talk, or I'll even close my eyes, but we have to talk this out!"

She laughed a little.

"What's funny?"

"You are," she said with a slight smile. "You're so desperate that you're willing to talk with your eyes closed. I don't think I could take you seriously.

"But now you see how badly I want to work this out," I said leaning my forehead to hers. "How badly I _need _to work this out."

Slowly, she kissed me. "I love you, Kendall."

"I love you, too, LeeAnn," I said.

I pushed her back onto the bed and started kissing her. I reached for the bottom of her shirt.

"Wait, Kendall," she said. "Right here? Right now?"

"Why not?" I asked.

"Because we're in Logan's bed."

"I don't care," I said while crashing my lips back to hers.

_**-*LeeAnn's P.O.V*-**_

I had my head on Kendall's chest. He was drawing circles on my back with his fingers.

"I love you," he murmured.

"I-" I stopped when the doorknob turned. I gasped.

"Hey," Logan said stepping into the room, "did you two work… Oh my God!"

Kendall chuckled and I blushed.

"Oh my God!" Logan repeated. "You two did not just have sex on my bed. That did not just happen! This is not happening right now!"

"It was Kendall's idea!" I said defensively. "Not mine!"

"I don't care whose idea it was," Logan said. "You two just had sex on the same sheets that I sleep on! Ugh, this is disgusting!"

"Logan, calm down," Kendall said.

Logan turned for the door. "I'm going to buy new sheets. And a new blanket. And new pillows. And maybe a new bed."

Logan left the room muttering the word 'disgusting' over and over again.

"I told you we shouldn't have done this," I said slapping Kendall's chest.

"That's not what I heard," Kendall said. He put his lips by my ear. "All I heard from your mouth was my name."

"Kendall!" I said slapping his chest again. "Stop that!" I glanced at the clock. It was 9:30. "I should probably go home."

"But I don't want you to leave." He pulled me close to him. "I'll miss you too much."

"I can ask my mom if you can stay the night," I said. "I'm sure she won't mind."

I grabbed my pants off the floor and got my phone. I dialed my mom's number.

"Hello?"

"Mom," I said, "I have a question."

"Yes, dear?"

"Can Kendall stay the night?" I asked.

I could tell she was hesitating. "Dean is still here."

"I know, but I don't care."

"It's fine with me, sweetie."

"Thanks mom," I hung up and faced Kendall. "Go get your stuff."

His face lit up. "She said yes?"

"I told you she wouldn't care."

Kendall stood up and reached for his pants. "What would she do if she knew that while you were on the phone with her, you were laying in bed naked with me?"

"Then she would kill me," I said as I put my shirt on. "She thinks I'm still a virgin."

Kendall and I ignored Dean when we walked into my house. We went straight up to my room.

"I love you, LeeAnn," he whispered to me.

"I love you, too, Kendall," I whispered back as I kissed him.

****Author's note:**

**Sorry I took almost a month to update! I know I said chapter 9 would've been up by the end of that week… I don't know why it wasn't! Life has been busy.**

**Hope you enjoy!**

**-Xoxo L**


	10. Chapter 10: Big Time Fight

_**-*Kendall's P.O.V*-**_

I was up before the sun came up. I couldn't sleep. Dean was sleeping right down the hall. I couldn't stop thinking about how much he hates me.

Around 9:30, there was a quiet knock on the door. I slowly moved LeeAnn and got up without waking her. I walked over to the door.

"Good morning, sweetie," LeeAnn's mom said. "I just wanted to let you two know that breakfast is ready. Is she still asleep?"

"Yeah," I said, "I'll wake her up and let her know."

"OK. And Kendall, you two can come back upstairs and eat in here instead of downstairs."

I smiled. "Thanks."

She walked away and I turned to go wake up LeeAnn. Someone grabbed my arm and pulled me into the hall.

"Listen here you little punk," Dean said quietly with his jaw clenched, "LeeAnn is my baby sister. You've already hurt her once and it tore her apart. I almost lost her. If you ever hurt her again, I will hurt you. I don't care if you leave the country, I will find you."

Dean was staring daggers. I jerked my arm away from him and shut the door. I walked over to LeeAnn and kissed her.

"Wake up, baby girl."

"I don't wanna," she mumbled.

"Well you need to," I said pulling the blanket off of her. "Let's go get breakfast and we'll come back up here to eat it. Your mom said to."

"A normal boyfriend would want to lay down and cuddle," she said as she got up and walked to the door.

I followed her. "Since when have I been normal?"

"True."

She grabbed my hand and we walked downstairs. I ignored Dean's glares and grabbed me and LeeAnn and plate.

"Morning mom," LeeAnn yawned.

"Morning sweetie," her mom replied. "Did you sleep well?"

LeeAnn smiled. "Yep."

"Your bed head is adorable, by the way," I whispered in her ear.

She let out a small giggle. "So is yours." She ran her hand through my hair.

"We'll be upstairs," LeeAnn said as she picked up her plate.

I glanced over my shoulder and saw Dean glaring at me. I leaned down and gave LeeAnn a kiss.

"I love you," I said quietly.

"I love you, too."

LeeAnn and I ate breakfast in silence on her bed. When we finished, she put the plates on the nightstand and climbed into my lap.

"I wonder if Logan actually bought a new blanket and sheets," she pondered.

I laughed. "It wouldn't surprise me if he did," I said. "Do you realize that we've been caught both times? Carlos and then Logan."

"I still can't believe Logan caught us," she said. "It was embarrassing, yet hilarious all at the same time."

"I just think it was hilarious."

_**-*LeeAnn's P.O.V*-**_

Kendall and I sat in silence for a while. It was nice, just me and him. When my phone went off, we both jumped. I read the text.

"My mom wants me to do the dishes," I said.

"I'll help you," Kendall said grabbing our dishes from this morning. "You wash, I'll dry."

"Sounds like a plan," I said smiling.

After we finished the dishes, Dean pulled me aside. "I need to talk to you."

"I don't wanna talk to you," I said as I pulled away from him.

"LeeAnn," he said sternly, "now."

I glanced at Kendall. "Just wait here, babe." I saw Dean's jaw clench at the sentence.

I followed Dean into the living room and sat down. I motioned for Dean to say what he needed to say.

"You need to dump Kendall," he finally said.

"No!" I said. "I'm not going to break up with him, Dean."

"He's famous," he said. "There are thousands of girls out there who want him. He could easily pick one and leave you."

"Kendall won't leave me," I said sternly. "He loves me."

"He's done it before, he'll do it again."

"He won't leave me, Dean! He loves me! Now why can't you just let me live my life? It's my relationship, not yours!'

"I almost lost you because of him. I don't want you to be with him!"

"I love him! So just stay out of this, Dean. It's my relationship, dammit!"

Dean's hand collided with my face with a loud smack. It caught me off guard and I fell backwards. Strong arms caught me before I hit the ground.

"Keep your hands off her!" Kendall yelled.

"What are you gonna do about it, popstar?" Dean asked as he got in Kendall's face.

"Get away from me," Kendall said with his jaw clenched. He shoved Dean back.

Dean pulled back and punched Kendall in the jaw. He staged backwards. I gasped. "Kendall!"

"Listen here, Kendall," Dean spat, "I don't want you near my sister anymore. You've hurt her way too much."

"I'm not leaving her just because you tell me to," Kendall said as he rubbed his jaw. Dean stepped towards them.

"Dean!" I yelled. I stood in front of Kendall. "Stop it! Just stop! Leave us alone. We don't have to listen to you and we won't. We love each other and that's that. So drop it!"

My mom walked into the living room. She noticed my red face and Kendall's bleeding lip. "What is going on in here?"

I glared at Dean. "He's trying to start crap again," I said as I moved Kendall's hand away from his jaw. He winced slightly. It was already bruising. "He hit Kendall. And me."

"Dean!" my mom yelled. "Why would you hit them?"

"LeeAnn got an attitude and Kendall shoved me," he said.

"He shoved you because you were all up in his face!" I said. "You were being a jerk, Dean. Quit trying to break us up!"

"Dean, I want you to leave them alone," my mom said.

"He's nineteen! How do you-"

"Leave them alone," she repeated. "Kendall, I'll go get you some ice."

"Thanks," Kendall replied. He looked up at me and put his hand on my cheek. "You OK, baby girl?"

I heard Dean scoff.

I moved his hand. "You're the one who got punched," I said. I gently kissed his jaw. He winced again. "How bad does it hurt?"

He shrugged. "I've had worse injuries. I've fallen off the stage before."

I laughed. "Always so graceful, aren't we?" He pulled me into his lap.

"Here sweetie," my mom said as she handed Kendall the ice pack. She went back to her room.

I kissed Kendall's cheek. His lip was still bleeding. I used my jacket sleeve to wip it off and then kissed his lips. I took the ice pack from him and held it to his face. He picked me up and carried me to the couch. I laid my head on his chest.

Dean was still watching us. I could feel it. I ignored it. I didn't want to deal with him. I just wanted to be with Kendall. I heard Dean's footsteps going away from us and the slam of a door.


	11. Chapter 11: Big Time Relapse

"I'm sorry he hit you," I said for the millionth time that night.

"LeeAnn, it's fine," Kendall said reassuringly. "It doesn't hurt that bad."

"But it's bruised and swollen," I protested. "And what are the guys gonna say?"

"I don't care what they say." He pulled into the driveway and put the car in park. He took my chin in his hand. "LeeAnn, listen. The reason I got this is because I was standing up for our relationship. I would do it again if I had to."

"I just feel so b-"

He cut me off with a kiss.

"Don't worry about it."

_**~*Kendall's P.O.V*~**_

I walked into the house after I dropped LeeAnn off. I prayed that the guys were in their rooms so I wouldn't have to explain anything. Luck was not on my side.

"Dude, what happened to your face?" James exclaimed when I walked through the kitchen. Logan and Carlos stared at me with wide eyes.

"How is it that all of you manage to be in the kitchen at the same time when I get home?" I asked.

"Just explain your jaw," Logan said. "Who hit you?"

I sighed. "It was Dean."

"He hit you? What'd LeeAnn say?"

"She got pissed," I said. "It started when he was telling her she couldn't see me anymore."

"What?" Carlos said. "He ca-"

"Let me finish." I sat down. "She went off on him. I was listening at the doorway. I looked around the corner right as he slapped her. That's when I got involved."

"What made him hit you?" James asked.

"He got in my face, so I pushed him backwards. Then he hit me. And it hurt like hell."

"Wow," Carlos said. "I'm surprised LeeAnn isn't here now."

"Her mom wants them to have a family meeting." I sighed. "I just haven't been lucky today."

"No, you got lucky yesterday," Logan said bitterly. "In my bed!"

James laughed. "Is that why your sheets are in the trash?"

Logan only nodded. He glared at me.

"At least I'm getting some," I said nonchalantly.

"Can't believe you screwed LeeAnn on Logan's bed," Carlos said.

"Yeah, neither can I," Logan muttered.

_**~*LeeAnn's P.O.V*~**_

"I don't care if neither of you want this," my mom said sternly, "we are having a family meeting."

I refused to look at Dean. My face was still red and I was sure Kendall's jaw was still swollen.

"LeeAnn, tell me your side of the story."

I sighed and started to speak. "Kendall was helping me with dishes earlier. When Dean told me he needed to talk to me, I followed him to the living room. He tried telling me I couldn't be with Kendall anymore. I told him that it was my relationship and to say out of it. Then he hit me."

Dean interrupted me. "Only beca-!"

"Dean, quiet," my mom demanded.

I shifted in my seat and continued. "That's when Kendall came into the scene. He told Dean to keep his hands off of me. Dean got in his face, so Kendall pushed him back. That's when he punched Kendall."

"Is that what happened, Dean?" my mom asked.

"Yes," Dean mumbled. He knew he was in trouble.

"Dean, I am very disappointed in you," my mother scolded. "You know LeeAnn loves him."

"I'm gonna go call Kendall and see if his jaw is any better," I said. My mother nodded. I started to walk to my room, but stopped once I reached the hall. I listened to their conversation.

"Mom, I don't like him," Dean said. "We almost lost her because of him! How can you stand to be around him?"

"Last year was rough," she replied. "But Kendall did what he thought was best. He made a mistake, Dean."

"A mistake that almost took my little sister's life!"

"I do not want you in their relationship, Dean." My mom's voice was cold. "They're both happy. This is the happiest LeeAnn has been in a year. Do _not _take that away from her. Kendall treats her like a princess, and he always has. There is no reason to break them up."

"Fine then. When Kendall leaves her for some celebrity and she ends up in the hospital again, I can't promise I won't say I told you so."

I heard the front door open, then slam shut. I ran to my room and immediately called Kendall.

"Hello?"

"Why is my brother such a douche?" I asked.

He laughed. "I was thinking the same thing."

"Oh yeah," I said. "Is your jaw feeling any better?"

"A little," he said, "but it still hurts."

"Kendall, I'm so sor-"

"Stop apologizing," he said. "It's not your fault."

"Yes it is," I argued. "If I wouldn't have sassed him, he wouldn't have hit me and you wouldn't have gotten involved."

"Maybe it's my fault."

"How on earth is this your fault?"

"If I would've never left you last year, you and him wouldn't be fighting!" He was yelling. "Or if I would've never come back, things between you two would be better."

"I shouldn't have reacted like that when you left anyways! I should've moved on, but I couldn't. If you wouldn't have come back, you'd be getting a letter in the mail about my funeral."

"I couldn't move on either, LeeAnn."

We were both silent for a while.

"Do you regret coming back?" I asked softly. My voice was shaky.

"I… I don't know," he said. My jaw dropped. "Don't get me wrong, LeeAnn. I love being back with you. I'm happy again. I just don't like what it's doing to you and your brother. You two used to be so close."

"My mom said he's trying to take my happiness from me," I said. I sighed. "It's true. I'll call you later."

I hung up before he replied. I walked to my dresser.

"I shouldn't be doing this," I muttered.

I dug around in my drawer. I finally found what I was looking for. I sat on my bed and twirled the pocket knife in my hands.

"Hello, old friend."

I flipped it open and examined the blade. I slowly brought it down to my wrist. Tears were falling from my eyes. I pressed down and winced when the familiar pain rushed through my body. I moved to the other wrist and pressed. And back and forth. I threw the blade across the room and looked at my wrists. There were about 15 cuts on each arm. I grabbed my phone.

"Hello?"

"Logan," I said. My voice cracked.

"LeeAnn?" he asked. "What's wrong? Are you crying?"

"Please come get me," I begged. "Please. I-I can't be alone right now. I don't trust myself."

"Yeah, yeah," he said. "I'm on my way."

"Thank you," I choked out.

I put my phone down. I buried my head in my pillow and cried until Logan showed up.


	12. Chapter 12: Big Time Surprise

Logan honked when he pulled up to my house. I ran out to his car and got in, silent tears still running down my face.

"LeeAnn, what's wrong?" Logan asked.

"Just take me to your house," I whispered. "Please."

"Tell me what's wrong," he demanded.

I didn't say a word. I just lived the sleeves of my jacket and showed him. His face fell.

"LeeAnn."

"They sting," I said softly.

"Let's get those cleaned up."

Logan led me inside and forced me to sit down at the kitchen table while he got the first aid kit. He pulled out everything he needed.

"LeeAnn, why?" he asked.

"I was on the phone with Kendall," I explained. "We were kind of arguing and… I don't really know what happened. I found my pocket knife and…" I faded out when he put something on my arm. It burned and I winced.

"Sorry," he said. I just shrugged.

"Logan, have you se-" Kendall stopped when he saw me. "LeeAnn?" He looked at my arms. His face was filled with pain. He walked towards me. "Oh my gosh, LeeAnn-"

Logan put his hand up and shook his head. "Kendall."

Kendall stared at me, possibly hoping for me to say something to him. I couldn't look him in the eye. I bit my lip and looked away.

"I'll guess I'll be in my room," Kendall said quietly. He looked at me again and walked away. I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding.

"Wanna go upstairs?" Logan asked when he finished cleaning my arms. "We can just lay down. It's getting kind of late."

"Sure," I mouthed. We walked up to Logan's room. I smiled when I saw his bed. "Nice sheets."

"Well, no way in hell was I sleeping on the others," he said. I let out a small laugh.

Logan gave me a pair of his sweatpants to change into and I crawled into bed with him.

"I don't know why this happened," I said suddenly. "I mean, it's been almost 5 months since I last cut. I'm happier than I've been in a year, but one little argument pushed me over the edge."

"What exactly was said?"

"I asked Kendall if he regretted coming back," I said, "and he said he didn't know."

"Ooh, bad move," Logan commented. "Is that it?"

"Pretty much." I shrugged. "But we've been fighting a lot lately. He should've just stayed gone. Maybe I would've moved on. Or maybe my mom would be planning my funeral."

"Don't talk like that," Logan said, grabbing my face. "Don't ever talk like that. The world needs more people like you."

"Depressed, suicidal, freaks?"

"No," he said softly. "Beautiful, incredible girls who care about others."

"I'm hardly what you can call beautiful or incredible," I whispered.

Logan lifted my chin and forced me to look at him. "I beg to differ."

He slowly leaned forward and placed his lips on mine. He pulled away, but I pulled him back for more. We rolled over to where I was straddling his hips. Logan's lips kissed their way to my neck. He started biting gently as I fumbled with the button on his pants.

_**-*Logan's P.O.V*-**_

LeeAnn cuddled into my side, breathing slightly heavier than normal. Her soft snores told me she was asleep.

There was a knock on the door. I hurried to get my shirt off the floor and put it on. I pulled the covers up to LeeAnn's neck to cover her bare back. The person knocked again.

"Come in," I said quietly.

"How's she doing?" Kendall asked when he walked in.

"She's fine," I said. "She cried some and fell asleep."

I was praying that Kendall wouldn't notice her clothes on the ground.

_**-*Kendall's P.O.V*-**_

"That's good," I said.

LeeAnn's hair fell off her shoulder. It was bare. Something on the ground caught my eye. A light pink fabric…

It was LeeAnn's shirt.

"Um, I'll, uh, see you in the morning," I stuttered. I had to get out of there. LeeAnn's shorts were by her shirt.

As soon as Logan's door shut behind me, tears started falling down my face. LeeAnn slept with Logan while I was down the hall. I collapsed on my bed and tried to hide my sobs.

"Dude, what's wrong?" Carlos asked as he walked in my room. "Are you crying?"

"N-no," I stammered. "I'm not c-crying."

"You're a terrible liar," he said as he sat beside me. "Tell me what happened."

"LeeAnn slept with Logan," I whispered. "I went in there and her clothes were on the ground. She cut herself again. She cut herself and slept with Logan."

"She cut again?" he asked. I nodded. "Wow."

"She didn't even call me," I said miserably. "She called Logan. And then she had sex… With Logan!"

"I don't really know what to say," he said. He sighed and started to rub my back.

_**-*LeeAnn's P.O.V*-**_

When I woke up, I was a little sore. I sat up and stretched.

"Morning, sleep head," Logan said as he walked of out his bathroom. "Breakfast is ready downstairs, but you might want to put some clothes on before you go."

I was confused and then it hit me.

I had sex with Logan.

I threw some clothes on and walked downstairs. Kendall was sitting at the table. He gave me a sad smile and I returned it. I walked up to him.

"I'm sorry about ignoring you last night," I said quietly.

He pulled me into his lap. "It's OK, baby girl." He kissed my temple. "I should be sorry. This is my fault." He kissed my wrists.

"Don't blame yourself," I said.

Logan walked into the kitchen. Kendall put me in the chair next to him and stood up. "We need to talk."

Kendall pulled Logan into the living room I stood by the door to listen.

"I can't believe you slept with LeeAnn!" Kendall half-yelled. My jaw dropped.

"You- How- What- How did you know?" Logan asked shock apparent in his voice.

"Her clothes were on the floor when I went in there last night," Kendall said. "I'm not stupid, Logan."

"I-I don't know why it happened," Logan stammered.

"You took advantage of her. She was hurt and vulnerable, so you decided to make a move. I can't believe you!"

"Kendall, that's not what happened! I wouldn't do that to her!"

There was a silence. I tried to wrap my head around the conversation.

"How could you do this to me?" Kendall finally asked. His voice was filled with pain. "You know how much I love her."

Logan's next words made me dizzy and light-headed.

"Have you ever stopped to think that I might love her, too?"

I leaned my back against the wall and grabbed my head. I didn't notice Carlos walk up.

"LeeAnn, what's wrong?" he asked.

My head was spinning. I looked up at Carlos. He looked concerned.

"Logan… Logan loves me," I managed to whisper. "He really loves me."

Everything went black as I fell to the ground.

****Author's note:**

**I'm so sorry I haven't updated all summer! I don't know why I haven't… I haven't done much except meet BTR, Cody Simpson, Alli Simpson, and Rachel Crow…(: Yeah.. There might be some drabbles about that soon…. But anyways! I'll try to update again before summer is over! I'm almost done with Chapter 13.**

**-Xoxo L**


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